Over the weekend I experienced my first 'I wanna' quit' moment. Granted, it's Shark Week (don't worry, I hadn't heard it called this either until I saw it mentioned on a fellow blogger's site... aunt flo? it's that time? shark week. LOVE IT)
Anyway. ANYWAY ~ during this particular week, my emotions tend to run a muck. They attempt to take over and sabotage any well made plans I might have. Knowing that was a probability, I believe I laughed out loud at one point as I realized the ridiculousness of my then thought.
I actually had the thought - " I'll be glad when this 21 days is over so...." and before the thought was complete, I laughed at myself. Have you ever had that thought? It's that honest moment of panic when you realize you really are going to have to change some things. You really are going to have to give up something you LLLOOOOVE!. ugh. And it's that old way of thinking, that has kept you stuck in your rut of unhealthy eating. Or maybe it's unhealthy thinking? or habits?
I knew right then, that I must be doing something right. I've heard the scripture that talks about 'taking every thought captive...' and at that moment I understood. It was going to be up to me to either finish that thought and let it take root - so that somewhere in my mind I would have given myself permission, to make it the 21 days and then go back to my familiar eating habits ~ or I could take that thought for what it was and trash it.
I no more want to go back to my old way of eating than I want to put my hand in a meat grinder, but my taste buds are rebelling in a big way. They don't agree. They are craving the sugar! They are craving the momentary 'peace' that comes when I allow myself to indulge in that Kryptonite. For a great blog post on this go here ~
So these 21 days have been absolutely necessary for me to understand just how addicted to sugar I really am. And they have been absolutely necessary for me to decide whether or not I meant what I said ~ or if it was all just a bunch of talk.
(I came across this blog this morning, and the picture in the middle really spoke to me.)
I want to change.
I want the results.
I want to be healthy inside and out.
I want things to be different, and my taste buds are just going to have to deal with it!
On a happier note, I did get to celebrate my birthday over the weekend with the best steak ever and 2 tiny pieces of chocolate. I allowed myself that small cheat but agreed to do the detox for
the whole 30 days instead of just the 21 as an exchange.
Oddly enough, I don't feel deprived by that. I feel energized. For the first time since I can remember, I'm in charge of me. I'm in charge of making a very real and lasting change, and that feels good.
So wherever you are on your journey, know that it's not easy even when people say it is!! It's just not. It's hard to make those choices. It's hard to stand by them. And some days it's hard to be confident that you can do it.
It's those days that you let others carry you. Read their blogs. View their transformation pictures with awe instead of judgement for yourself.
Know it's possible.
Then go do the thing you think you cannot do! ~
Breakfast ~ Green shake and vitamins
Snack ~ Arm post workout
Lunch ~ Pork tenderloin & Onions, Green beans
Snack ~ sliced chicken, almonds
Dinner ~ Bacon burger and avacado, carrot shake
workout for today:
Motivational Video: Hannibal for King http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WSgBXWVy_8&feature=related
Favorite Blog: A wheat farmer weighs in on Wheat Belly http://www.wheatbellyblog.com/2012/01/a-wheat-farmer-weighs-in-on-wheat-belly/
The Nourished Kitchen has lots of wonderful recipes http://nourishedkitchen.com/
For those of you with cave babies - this wonderful mother has an entire site dedicated to what she feeds her little ones https://www.facebook.com/pages/Cave-Baby/223386097711514?sk=wall
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